August 20, 2006

My Solution To The Planetary Crisis

There's currently a big brouhaha about whether to demote Pluto from its planetary status, or whether to keep it as planet under a definition that would also include hundreds of other objects in the solar system.

I don't understand what the problem is. When I learned the alphabet back in kindergarten, I learned that there were five vowels. They were a, e, i, o, u, and sometimes y. Now if you count the vowels in that list you get six, not five. But that doesn't change the fact that there are five vowels, and y is one of them, sometimes.

So why can't we just say there are eight planets, and Pluto is one of them. We can then define "planet" with a definition that excludes Pluto, while giving Pluto some kind of honorary planet status.

We do things like this all the time. There are crayolas called "white" and "black" despite the fact that those are not real colors. And Canada is a member of the United Nations, despite the fact that it's not a real country. Also, Paris Hilton recorded a CD despite the fact that she's not a real singer.

So let's just call Pluto a planet and move on to more urgent global problems.

You're welcome. That's what I'm here for, to solve the big issues.

Posted by: annika at 12:09 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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1 You MUST have a Y chromosome! Man, a bear in most relations—worm and savage otherwise,— Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise. Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act. -Kipling

Posted by: Casca at August 20, 2006 01:01 PM (2gORp)

2 "And Canada is a member of the United Nations, despite the fact that it's not a real country." I almost spit out my coffee when I read this - freakin' hilarious. Thanks for reminding me that "you need not always be grave. For jokes as well as justice come in with speech."

Posted by: Blu at August 21, 2006 10:18 AM (K0h0f)

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