November 03, 2008

Emnergency Preparedness Kits

A few years ago I decided to make an emergency preparedness kit. They're definitely good things to have, and Chris is always adding things to ours whenever he finds something useful at Wal Mart or wherever. It's also a good idea to check them from time to time, just to make sure things like batteries and canned food are still good.

Here's ours:

survkit.jpg

It's by no means complete. We have all our bottled water in the bottom two shelves of the bathroom closet, and we have extra blankets in another plastic underbed box. I just put the HK on top for effect, we actually keep it in another safe but easily accessible location.

In the picture, the inventory is as follows:

roll of 100 4 gal. plastic garbage bags
roll of toilet paper
small bottle of clorox bleach
box of 48 AA batteries from Costco
super duper first aid kit, from Wal Mart
diamond Strike-A-Fire thingies
box of diamond matches
survival book
4 green chemical light thingies (getting more)
Off insect repellent
5 cans of Spam
2 dust masks
heavy duty gardening gloves
pack of Sternos
compass
whistle
snake bite kit
Swiss Army style knife
big ol' Swedish pocket knife
hand crank combo radio/flashlight/cellphone charger
plastic poncho
pocket led flashlight

A word about that flashlight. I love it because it's super bright and only uses one AA battery. Led is better than flashlights that use bulbs because they take less power and you don't have to worry about needing extra bulbs. Most pocket led lights use two batteries, but look for the ones made by Coast. I have this one. Its all metal and really solid. I think I got it at Wal Mart.

Since our kit is a work in progress, it's heavy on toys but light on essentials. Some things I'd like to add are a small lantern, rope, maybe a lightweight tent, one of those silver blankets, and more compact food products. We should have two weeks worth of food for two people, so I'm not sure what would be the most efficient way to do that. Maybe Top Ramen, but then you gotta worry about water. Lots of Powerbars too probably, but I hate Powerbars. Also: dental care and feminine hygeine products, aspirin and antibiotics. I have bleach for purifying water, which is important after a big earthquake, but I'd like to get one of those fancy osmosis filters too. I'm also looking for recommendations on pepper spray and walkie talkie brands.

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May 10, 2008

Sing It With Me

I need a stapler.
I need my hair done.
I need a Mother's Day gift.
I need to eat lunch.

I paid my bills.
I fucked around on the internet.
I recharacterized my Roth IRA contribution to a traditional IRA contribution.
I folded some clothes.

I got on a t-shirt.
I got on some jeans.
I got a scrunchie in my hair.
It's too hard to rhyme these things.

We're going to the mall.
We're going to the Post Office.
We're going swimming.
We're going to Pottery Barn.

You sent me a text message.
I sent you a text message.
You sent me a text message.
I sent you a text message.

I haven't decided what to wear on the plane.
I haven't decided what to do on Tuesday.
I haven't decided about the long term.
I haven't decided, okay?

It might be nice in Florida next week.
It might be a fun trip.
It might be a good time to quit smoking.
It might or might not rain.

They wait for a package.
They are not like me.
They talk a lot.
They don't have a clue.

I wish her good luck with her baby.
I wish him good luck with his diet.
I wish you good luck with whatever your doing.
I wish I were comfortably rich.

You are driving to Palm Springs.
You are wearing my favorite sweater.
You were upset about something or other.
You aren't anymore.

My hair is still wet.
My car looks brand new.
My tummy is growling.
My eyes are blue.

I will eat lunch.
I will find a perfect Mother's Day gift.
I will get my hair done next week.
I will buy a stapler.

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May 14, 2007

Old Joke For A New Rate

Every time the Post Office raises the price of stamps, I trot out an old joke I heard years ago.

[I say] Did you hear the post office just raised the price of stamps again?

[You say] They did?

[I say] Yah, they needed the money to buy more "next window please" signs.

ba-dum-pump. I'll be here the rest of the week.

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May 13, 2007

Things To Miss About Sacramento

[an Annika's Journal list]

As Dorothy said to the scarecrow, I think I'll miss them the most.

Things I won't miss:

  • Stupid traffic on every single freeway
  • Stupid one way streets that make no sense
  • Stupid unnecessary and counterproductive car-pool lanes
  • K Steet
  • The Kings
  • The mosquito

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March 22, 2007

YouTube Of The Day

This is Tom Jones. Enjoy!

I actually saw Tom Jones in Vegas once. I went as a joke, but came out a believer. The man puts on a fantastic show! We got seated at a table in the front row too. I was so close I could see the spit and sweat flying. We got such great seats due to a tricky move by my boyfriend at the time. As we stood in line he kept a twenty clutched in his hand so the usher could see it. Then while the guy led us down front, my boyfriend palmed the twenty and handed him a five. I'm sure the usher was pissed, but what the hell. Oh by the way, chicks really did throw underwear up on stage for Tom to wipe his sweat with. I thought that was just an icky legend, but it's true. I managed to stay fully clothed though.

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January 09, 2007

The Big Stink

The "big stink" yesterday in New York reminds me of a go-around I had with a snotty PG&E representative a few years ago. I had just moved into a new apartment.

Me: "Yes, I'm calling to report a gas leak."

PG&E rep: "How do you know there's a gas leak?"

Me: "I can smell it."

PG&E rep: "Okay, what do you smell?"

Me: "Gas."

PG&E rep: "Describe the smell for me."

Me: "It smells like gas. Are you going to send someone out or not?"

PG&E rep: "I need to first verify if there's a problem."

Me: "There is. I have a gas leak."

PG&E rep: "Does it smell like rotten eggs?"

Me: "I... I've never smelled rotten eggs. I don't know. It smells like gas."

PG&E rep: "Natural gas is odorless."

Me: "But I've smelled gas before and this is what it smells like."

PG&E rep: "You can't smell natural gas. It's odorless."

Me: "But I smell gas."

PG&E rep: "For safety reasons, we put a chemical in the gas in order to make it detectable."

Me: "Alright, then I smell the chemical you put in the gas in order to make it detectable."

PG&E rep: "Okay, does it smell like rotten eggs?"

Me: "Look, I have no idea what a rotten egg smells like. I don't know what kind of home you grew up in, but in my family we didn't keep a lot of rotten eggs around the house."

PG&E rep: "I'm sorry ma'am, but we get a lot of false alarms and I can't send anyone over to your house unless I can verify whether there's a gas leak."

Me: "Well, how else would I know I have a gas leak other than by smelling gas? What is it about 'I smell gas' that you don't understand..."

This went on for a few minutes longer and finally the a-hole relented and sent a repairman out. Turns out that the guy next door had died and his stove was leaking gas like crazy. In all honesty, I might have been smelling gas odor mixed with dead guy. But I suppose if I had said that, my call would have been transferred to the coroner's office instead.

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November 20, 2006

Car Question

So I'm thinking about getting a new sled. Assuming I graduate and pass the bar, etc. Annikamobile 4.0's transmission is making funky noises, so I think it's time.

I like that new Acura TL. It's modest yet stylish, and the radio is pimp! But I don't like the idea of paying for 91 octane all the time, which is recommended according to the brochure. Does anyone know if that's for real? Would I really fuck it up if I used regular unleaded instead?

My brother says it has to do with the high compression ratio, but don't the Accords also have a high compression ratio? Accords take regular unleaded, but they don't have the 5.1 surround sound radio.

My brother says if I'm willing to spend $30,000 on a new car, I should just put 91 octane in it. But that seems like such a waste, like paying for valet parking when you can just self park.

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November 09, 2006

Random Conversational Snippet

[part of a continuing series*]

me: (noticing two opened red envelopes on the counter) What did Netflix send us?

boyfriend: Uhh, Crazy/Beautiful and that one with Kevin Spacey.

me: What one with Kevin Spacey?

boyfriend: Uhh, Tampax, I think.

me: lol... I think you mean K-Pax.

boyfriend: That's it, K-Pax. Tampax is coming later this month...

me: (throws object at b/f)
_______________

* stolen from inspired by Dawn Summers

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October 31, 2006

New Word

I learned a new Spanish word today while having lunch with my boyfriend and his mom. She's the sweetest lady, and a former U.S. Army officer. Kerry's face flashed across one of the tv's in the restaurant, and the conversation went like this:

b/f's mom: What a loser. I don't listen to that culícagao.

me: what's that?

b/f's mom: In the island, that's what we say when somebody is full of shit.

me: but what does culícagao mean?

b/f's mom: shit ass.

Ha Ha, I love it! I'm going to use it.

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September 18, 2006

A Match Made In Heaven

My boyfriend Chris is a huge pastrami fan. And I am a big time gouda fan. We both like football, and tonight we combined all three things.

pastramisand.jpg

That's my sandwich. Being a purist, Chris harshly criticized my decision to include the roasted red peppers. But I considered it a major victory when I convinced him to try the gouda on his simplistic masterpiece.

Is it match made in heaven? If you mean pastrami and gouda, definitely.

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August 03, 2006

Danish Protest Video

Here is the video of the Danish protest rally, which I mentioned in my July 21st post from Copenhagen. Sorry it's only seven seconds long, my CF disk was getting full, but you get the gist of it.

The yellow flag is none other than the flag of Hezbollah, an organization that has killed countless innocent Israelis, a good number of innocent Americans, and wouldn't lose sleep if it killed a few Danes either.

In the foreground you see the edge of a black banner. I forgot what it said, probably something about the Jews. Anyway, I was about to turn around and go into the internet cafe, when the teenager who was holding one end of the banner saw me and asked if I wanted to hold it for a while. I said nej, of course.

Interestingly, among the 100 or so people there, the dude on stage was the only one who appeared muslim. The rest were typical eurotrash hippies, either real young or old Deadhead types.

We generally avoided any political discussions in our interactions with the Danes and Swedes during our trip, and the Scandinavians we met were stereotypically polite so the "war" subject never came up. The only anti-American thing I saw during the ten days was that someone had smashed the front window of the American food store on Gamla Stan in Stockholm. The damage was taped up, and the store remained open.

My aunt and uncle, being Jutlanders, are pro-Danish and therefore pro-DANCON (i.e. Iraq.)

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July 31, 2006

I'm Back!

I got back on Friday, but I haven't posted since then due to a combination of jet lag, catching up with family, saying goodbye to Chris, and spending hours on the phone with Indian tech support because Verizon sucks. But I'm back and I'm afraid I've forgotten how to blog.

Many thanks to Victor for doing such a wonderful job holding down the fort! Have a great vacation dude!

I took a bunch of pictures but most of them turned out boring. I'll post some more later. For now, here's a couple I thought turned out nice.

CPH01.jpg

That's a picture from Copenhagen, taken near the Kastellet army barracks. You can see how nice the weather was.

ARH02.jpg

We met these two ladies on our way to my aunt and uncle's farm on Jutland.

STK03.jpg

And we watched a potter make stuff like this by hand at the Skansen theme park in Stockholm.

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July 27, 2006

I'm Still Here

I was in the middle of a long post about Sweden, and after saying something critical, got booted off the machine. And they say Scandinavia is a free society.

So I'll make this short. The internet in our hotel is free but there's like a zillion kids around here and they all want on, so I got to get off.

The funniest thing about Sweden is the opportunity to make up new names for the indecipherable Swedish names.

For instance, many streets are named for simians. There's Smart Orangutan, Western Orangutan, and Stork Orangutan. There's a bank called Foreskin Ring Bank. There's a palace called Cunnilingus Slot. Hahaha! It's right next to Storky Can!

The differences between Denmark and its old rival Sweden were unexpected. Danes are better looking, more homogenous, friendlier and blonder. Sweden has better food, more fat people, more diversity, and much more spectacular architecture.

Swedes are so proud of the fact that they were once a great power. I don't get it. The key word is "once." Sure they had a few great years back in the 1600s, but come on. Get over yourselves, guys. What have you done lately? Okay, IKEA, besides that.

I also noticed that Danish chicks all have perfect skin. I'm totally jealous. Also perfect feet. Not a callous or bunyan in the whole country. My theory is that they must wear thick and comfy socks all winter, while we in the rest of the world jam our feet into tight but fashionable shoes.

While chicks wear flip-flops almost exclusively in Copenhagen, in Stockholm the most common shoe is the mesh front slipper that I hate. In the working class city of Århus, on Jutland, it's a about half and half.

Two things are noticeably absent from both countries. No homeless people and no Starbucks. Not a single one. So they got that going for them. I realize this might explain the way that Scandinavians can afford their heavy taxation. If you consider all the money I needlessly hand over to Starbucks and homeless people on a regular basis, I could probably just send that money to the government. There's how we can fund the safety net!

It's been unseasonably warm here, although not as hot as in SoCal, from what I hear. It's been low 80s all trip long, although it drizzled one morning when we were in Copenhagen. I'm glad I didn't bring the leather jacket.

We've been eating like pigs since we got to Stockholm. We're going to fly out tomorrow, and as soon as we get back it will be time for a strict diet. Chris says it's not as bad as I think, since we've been burning so many calories walking, but the danger is the temptation to go on eating at the same rate after we return.

Well, that's it for now. We're taking it easy today and doing some shopping. Chris and I had a late night at some Irish pub in Old Town, watching Celtic get beat by Man U.

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July 21, 2006

Hello From København!

Hello everybody. As I write this, I'm sitting in an internet cafe on Vesterbrogade in the great city of København. Hey, there's a key for "ø" here! Victor, you might be interested to know that there's a protest going on right outside this place at this very moment. Bunch of dirty white dudes chanting along with an Immam. The same old shit you're seeing over there, I'm sure. The crowd is about 100, I'd guess. Che t-shirts are well represented. Now they're shouting "death to Israel" in arabic. Yes, it's one of the few arabic phrases I recognize. There's also a flag of Hezbollah, and an American flag with skulls instead of stars. Ho-hum.

Anyways, not much to say. Købanhavn is not really that interesting, as my parents warned me. It's hot and sticky, about 80 degrees, although it rained today which was nice. The sun goes down at 10 and gets up at 4. The food is well prepared and tasty, but give me Iberian or Italian food anytime. I still haven't found a good danish.

Yesterday we saw many museums, including the Danish History, The Danish Art, and the Museum of Danish Resistance, which was the best of the three. We saw the Little Mermaid, which I guess is some kind of must see. I'll post pictures when I get back, if my internet is up by then.

Oh the flight over was at least 24 hours long. We thought we'd get DVT for sure. Who knew there'd be a massive lightning storm on the East Coast, which royally fucked up our travel route?

One vignette before I sign off. We went to Louisiana today, which is totally worth the trip. No lie, it may be the best modern art museum I've ever been to. They do modern art right. There's an excellent video art installation, and the Paol K... (can't remember his last name but Strawman digs him) design exhibit was fantastic. And the grounds were gorgeous.

There's a bluff overlooking the Øresund, and you can see Sweden in the distance. And there's also a garden (have) with lots of maze-like trails and a long slide and little wooden forts with tunnels and shit all along the hillside. And a running stream. I thought it was strange that there were no Danish kids running around in that park. If me and my brother had gone there when we were little, we would have tore that place up! We'd have gotten so muddy, they'd never have let us back into the museum. Any American kid would. As it was, me and Chris had a great time playing around that garden like a couple of little kids!

Oh there were plenty of Danish kids at the museum, but they were all inside a white room at a white table drawing pictures of furniture under the tutelage of a stern Danish babysitter. How sad! In microcosm, I guess that says something about the difference between America and Denmark. They'll keep making great furniture, while we'll keep pushing the envelope and bustin' things up, but having fun at the same time.

Well, tomorrow we're off to Jutland to stay for a couple of days with my aunt and uncle. Then we go to Sweden. Hopefully I can check in with you again.

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July 11, 2006

Important Status Update For A's J Fans

My boyfriend and I have finally decided upon our summer vacation destination. Some of you may know that I had talked about going to Japan, and then Italy for a while. Then my mom asked, why don't you finally go and see Denmark? So Chris and I thought about it, and it made perfect sense.

I haven't been back there since I was about one, and I have always been curious. But I always felt like it wouldn't be right to go without my mom, so I kept postponing the trip. Since my mom doesn't fly anymore, I just kind of gave up on the idea. But now I want to support Denmark, so why not spend my travel dollars there? And everybody speaks English, plus it's a lot cooler in summer than Italy, which we'll probably save for a winter or fall trip.

So, my triumphant return to the place of my birth is scheduled for next month. And with the best travelling companion I could ever have, too! It's very exciting.

This means of course, that I will be on vacation starting next Tuesday. A very special guest blogger will be taking over for me. It's Victor of Publius & Co., who has been on a blogging hiatus for a couple of months. We hope he will return to his own Mu.Nu blog soon, but in the meantime it will be great to have him working the levers over here.

Jeopardy will continue until next Monday. We'll see how far we can get before my vacation. Then we'll pick up again after I return on July 29th. Don't freak out about this, Jeopardy fans. Remember last year, we didn't get to final Jeopardy until the end of August! Annika's Jeopardy is like the Tour de France. It's a grueling ordeal, but a fun one, and with 50% fewer Frenchies. So it will be totally worth the wait!

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June 06, 2006

I Voted

So I voted today, proudly. While I was standing in line to get my newfangled, but not improved ballot, there was a girl in front of me wearing the standard avante garde uniform. Black hair, peasant dress, multicolored bohemian purse with buttons for obscure bands affixed to the strap. You know, dressed just the same as all the other non-conformists her age. It was her first time voting, so the elderly gentleman handing out ballots said, "congratulations."

I was curious about her party affiliation. I'm ashamed to admit it, but I was. I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, since I used to look just like her, actually.* You can't judge a book by its cover. I want to know a person's politics before I judge them.

However, I had to stifle a snicker when the kindly gentleman handed her the ballot and announced, "Green." A bolder person than I might have said this:

Wow girl, I was almost hoping you'd surprise me. But alas you're "non-conformity" entirely conforms to my first impression of you. I just want to know something. Do you believe everything your professor tells you? Yah, the "cool" one who wants you to call him by his first name? It's okay. You might grow out of it someday. In the meantime keep voting Green. I'd much rather you waste your vote come November than have you vote Democrat, so thanks.
Luckily, I am not a bold person, so I continued on my merry way, and voted against 81 and 82. Perhaps I'm a little too unfair to this first time voter girl. She actually deserved her congratulations. She managed to drag her ass down to the polls, when 66% of her fellow Californians couldn't be bothered with it.
_______________

* Not today though. I wore a heather gray polo shirt, khaki capris, and spotless white Keds. Oh and RayBans. I looked so Republican as I walked down to my polling place, people must have thought I got lost on my way to Newport Beach.

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June 03, 2006

The Most Amazing Thing You've Ever Seen

On Yahoo! Answers, somebody asked the question: "What is the most amazing sight you have ever seen?" Lots of people mentioned either the birth of a child or some astronomical phenomenon. It's interesting that a fair number of answers involved marine mammals, including my own answer:

i went whale watching and saw a blue whale, that was amazing. but the most amazing thing happend later that day when our boat got caught in a gigantic school of dolphins. seriously there were like thousands of dolphins jumping for like miles around our boat. i'll never forget that.
I'm curious, what is the most amazing thing you ever saw?

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April 11, 2006

New Scam I Fell For... Fuck!

I fell for a new bum scam today, but it's a good one.

I pulled into a gas station and before I even shut off the engine there appeared next to me a rough looking biker dude on a beat up old v-twin. The engine was clearly smoking. He was unshaven and filthy. He's saying something, so I reluctantly shut off the radio and roll down the window partway. I'm thinking, maybe I should just leave, but I was running on fumes. Plus he'd probably follow me anyway. And damn if I wasn't the only person at the gas station too. Rotten luck.

So I see what he says. He's mumbling something about a gasket. Seems his engine is fucked up somehow and he wants like fifty bucks to go get a gasket. Keep in mind it's about 6:00 pm and all mechanics are closed.

So I give him my standard answer.

"Why don't you call a friend and ask him to come get you?"

That always throws a bum. Very few of them expect that question, this asshole included. But he countered by sticking to the script.

"I just need some help to get a $20 gasket."

Oh, now it's $20! Interesting. But the engine is obviously in trouble. Smoke is coming out from all over.

"I don't see why you don't call a friend or a family member. That's what I'd do," I say again.

"I just need a $20 gasket. I'll take whatever you can spare. C'mon help me out. I know a guy down the street who can put the gasket in for me."

"Dude, I ain't givin' you no fifty bucks. Just park the bike and call a family member to come pick you up."

Now, for just a split second, I sense annoyance flash across his face. Then it's gone, but not without leaving a profound effect on my strategy.

[Insert the part where I curse California and it's stupid CCW laws.]

He responds, "Nobody's gonna come all the way from Riverside to pick me up."

I'm wondering how he made it to Sacramento from Riverside on that smoking hulk, while I discreetly remove two dollars from my wallet.

"Here's two bucks. But I don't know how that's gonna get you anywhere."

Without a word of thanks, he takes the money from my outstretched arm and tears off down the road on the broken bike, which seems to accelerate just fine.

The moral of the story is this: You may catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, but a menacing look can get you two bucks.

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February 09, 2006

Most Weirdest iTunes Purchase Ever

I bought Jerry Reed's "Eastbound And Down" yesterday. Hey, it was only .99 cents. Well, it was running through my head all day for some unknown reason and and it's actually a pretty catchy tune.

My brother used to drive a truck and he went through this whole Smokey And The Bandit obsession a few years back. One of the stupidest movies ever, but somehow entertaining in a campy sort of way.

On the same automotive theme, does anyone know about car batteries? I needed a jump start yesterday for about the third time in the last few months. I always seem to leave the lights on more often when I'm super busy and stressed out like I have been. I suppose I could just not be super busy, but then I would end up homeless and destitute, so that's not a good option.

Anyways, I remember hearing about some kind of special battery for people like me, which is like two batteries in one: a normal battery and a smaller emergency battery so you can jump start yourself if needed. Has anyone else heard of this? I checked Sears' site, but it seems they don't offer this kind of thing in their Diehard selection. If this kind of battery exists, it would really help me out, since it doesn't look like I'm ever going to rid myself of the habit of leaving the lights on.

Oh and by the way, my car does have an automatic light turner-offer. The problem is you have to actually open the door and get out of the car for it to work. The trouble is, I run the batteries down while I'm actually sitting in the car; I don't get out. This happens because I sometimes sit in there drinking my coffee and studying before class. Embarrassing.

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January 27, 2006

I'm In Santa Barbara

I'm here for a wedding. I love Santa Barbara. I just saw a homeless dude with bluetooth! And I ain't talking about his dental work. He had a full-on earpiece. How weird is that?

The weather is gorgeous. The whole frickin' town is gorgeous. I'm in a bar, drinking Guinness, and enjoying a black forest ham panini. Gorgeous. I'm going to hang out by the pool later. In the middle of frickin' winter! More later.

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