So my roommate and i are going up north for our birthdays next week. As you may or may not know, Betty and i were born on the exact same day. i haven’t been back there since last June and i’m looking forward to seeing all my old friends. Our dance card is pretty full already. One of my exes, Tomasz, heard that i was coming up and he gave me a call tonight, while Jason was over, so that was kinda uncomfortable. Tommy is unique in that we've always gotten along much better since we stopped dating than we ever did during our year together. We’re still pretty close. But new boyfriends always seem to think they have to compete with old boyfriends. If we were lions, they’d have to fight it out amongst themselves. But of course, we’re humans, not lions, so i think Jason should get over it. Tommy wanted to invite me and Betty to a dinner party next Friday, given by his software company. They’re rolling out some new game this month and they rented out a nice restaurant to celebrate. Of course i want to go, it sounds like fun and i would like to see him again. Nothing sneaky, i don’t have any feelings for Tommy, other than friendship. He’s quite an interesting fellow. We met when i was in undergrad and dated during sophmore and junior year. He’s one in a series of bald headed musicians that i managed to get mixed up with. Tommy is the drummer/DJ/computer-wiz with the less-than-serious personality. A big tatooed guy who sometimes quoted Shakespeare and liked to get into fistfights while drunk, which seemed to happen a lot in the old days. That’s the thing about drummers. Getting drunk and fighting is an occupational requirement for them. In fact, Tommy got in a fistfight with some guy on the night we met. We were both shitfaced. i was at a bar, playing pool, drinking Jack and Coke. He flirted like crazy with me. He was so cocky and forward, but i ate it up because i was much more immature than i am now (at least i think so). He said shit like: “You’re real cute, i bet you kiss good too.” Yah, yah, i know; i said i was immature back then, okay? Pretty soon we ended up making out in the hallway leading to the bar’s bathroom. Yes, right in the midst of all those people waiting in line. Then somehow we got separated and i didn’t see him again until later on when there was a big commotion near the entrance. It was Tomasz, swinging his arms at another dude and not connecting, because one of the bouncers had him in a headlock. He and the other guy got thrown out into the street. i remember it was raining hard. i went out to see if he was okay. He was fine, not a scratch on either of them. Since it was pouring, Tommy gave me a ride back home and the rest is history. We had a lot of fun together for the first three months, which is my typical honeymoon period with guys. One of the most memorable experiences of my life was when i got to sing in front of Tommy’s band. We practiced for a month before the gig and i sang two songs in a little club, which has since closed down. i’ve never been so nervous in my life. i was much more nervous than i had been when i played Guenevere in high school or when i soloed in the choir. After the gig, the band told me that i did great, but the guitar player said that he’d love to have me do it again after another couple months of practice. Somehow, that didn’t sound too encouraging. Anyway, i had no intention of ever singing with a band again, even though i had a blast. i’m just too shy. Tommy and i finally broke up because we started arguing all the time over stupid shit. We tried getting back together a few times over the years, but it never worked out. He was my first real serious boyfriend, and i learned an important lesson from our relationship. We fought because we were young and we thought it was good to say whatever was on our minds, which i now know is not necessarily a good thing. i mean, when you’re with someone, you still have to make an effort to be polite and watch how you express yourself. You can’t take everything to heart and you definitely can’t bark at each other over every little thing, which is what we did. Being fucked up most of the time didn't help either. Also, Tommy’s a Taurus, which is a big no-no for me. But like i said, we’ve been great friends since we stopped dating and i do miss hanging out with him. In fact, he came to my graduation last year, even though Pete, my loser ex, blew it off. There’s an ex whom i have no desire to bump into while i’m in S.F. i have no idea what Pete’s doing these days, nor do i care.

Posted by: annika at 10:51 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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